As I write all these, I’m surprised by my positivity. Not all days are like this. There are (still) days I’m madly homesick, days that my heart feels like it’s ripped apart in pieces. There are (still) nights I can’t sleep, worrying about my family back home. At one point I told Paula that I’m just so tired… And she told me, plain and simple, that I can’t be tired. In a way, she’s right.
Here in Singapore, I almost never worry about me and Paula anymore. Living here, especially during these times, is a huge privilege. We just moved to a slightly more spacious home, and the only thing we ever argue about is the width of the dining table, or the design of the rug. I have eased my way back into eating her amazing dishes, and I’ve also gone back to the mat! I can’t continue where I left off anymore, so I’ll just have to begin again. So I shall begin again.
Good morning. I’m tired. I bet you’re tired.
But we’re awake and alive and that’s enough. C’mon, c’mon.
– Lin-Manuel Miranda